Anxiety in Art

Trust the Process

I recently started a mentorship to better direct my art career and build my skills. And with any good art class, you get homework. My assignment was to create some characters—specifically animals and children. Two things I don’t have a lot of experience in.

As I began to think about what I’d draw, I felt the fear and anxiety tower up like a giant, waiting to clobber me and reveal to the world what a fraud I was.

So, I did what I always do best. I mulled it over in my head, beat it like a dead horse, and didn’t draw a single thing until I couldn’t plan anymore. Eventually, there was nothing left to do but put pencil to paper and sketch it out.

I love and hate this part of the process.

Messy Sketches

For someone who has drawn her entire life—and has even won awards for her art—there is nothing more humbling than an empty page. You immediately forget how to draw. You start questioning if you even remember your basic shapes, because that is definitely not a circle. And don’t even get me started on the messy lines my shaky hand is producing.

I am a perfectionist. I like things to be perfect the first time. Unrealistic thinking. Sketches are supposed to be messy.

Putting my pencil to paper, I gave myself a pep talk. I told myself what I tell all my art students: trust the process. This is just the planning stage. This is not the time to make a polished piece of art. Remember to simplify and think in basic shapes. Collect reference materials to support your ideas—and actually look at them.

My inner dialogue continued with each round of bad, messy sketches. But as I stayed the course, some ideas started to come together—and it was better than I hoped for.

The brainstorming stage, sketch phase, doodle stage—whatever you want to call it—always looks like hot garbage to me. But it’s necessary. It helps you warm up and quickly get several ideas down on paper.

This scary, anxiety-producing phase is something I deal with in every art project, even when it’s something I’ve done before. But it’s just that—a phase. Once you get over yourself, trust the process, and keep working the idea, the fear starts to fizzle out and you can see it come to life. Sometimes it turns into something completely different than what you envisioned. And it’s beautiful.

What are some ironclad strategies to combat this torture? No clue. But this is what I tell myself:

• Stop overthinking it. It’s a pencil and a piece of paper, for Pete’s sake.

• Keep it simple. Focus on your basic shapes and forms. You know how to build from those.

• Study your references.

• Slow down. It’s not a race.

• Pray. Prayer is good. You should probably do that first.

• Not every piece is your magnum opus.

• You can do this, because you’ve done it before.

• Practice drawing in a private sketchbook. Enjoy a good brain dump. Daily. Then don't show anyone. Ever. Cause it'll ruin your street cred. Just kidding. Seriously, don't think you need to show anyone.

If you’re a control freak like me, it’s hard to let go and get sketchy. It takes practice, and it does get easier the more you do it—even though the fear is still there, lingering on every blank page, waiting to ruin your next painting.